Sometimes I just wish my mom had live, things will be so much different. I just want a very common, normal family with a working dad and a mom to take care of me. Just like that I will be more than contented. However, things just don't work out we wanted to be doesn't it? Choose the wrong course, quit and ended up with another course I like, but I just not sure how long does it take for my passion and determination to dries up. Things just suddenly go downhill. Friendship separated, and to be honest, I hate almost all my relatives, but not the one I'm staying with. I'm really don't know what to do now... Study, graduate, find job and keep working.. I know I shouldn't think about the future but I just can't help it. Can mummy just take me away.. Can some vehicles just hit me so hard that I would have die instantly? 我没勇气死,但我真的很想死....